Falling For The Man I Married

Chapter 71: Releasing the pain

Madi's POV:

"Good morning Aunt Madi!"

I felt the sudden sinking to the side of my bed. It's because of my seven years old niece, Sarah from my older sister Madison. She jumped up and hugged me on the back as I lay on my stomach.

"Aunt Madi, wake up!" she climbed onto my back and started making me her horse.

-'Oh my dearest God! Why did you give me such a lovable niece?'-

"Sweetie, it's still early!"

I complained as I took one of the pillows to cover my face, but the silly kid took it away from me and repeatedly jumped on the bed.

"No! It's already eight o'clock, it's actually late in the morning."

"Oh God! Sarah, stop that! You might fall!" I opened my left eye.

"No! I'm used to this, Aunt Madi. Come on, get up, we're still going to the park, you promised me!"

"Yeah, I know, but get down, sweetie, and play with your dolls in the living room, I'll just follow you there," I said taking the pillow again but she took it out from my hands.

"No! You're lying!" Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

"I'm not! I swear."

"No! You always say that every morning, but you just go back to sleep again!"

-'Oh, my God! I can no longer lie to this stubborn kid!'-

"Hey, did you wake up your Auntie again?" I heard my sister's voice at the door frame.

"Because she promised me, mommy, we're going to the park this morning!"

"But it's still early, baby."

"No! Look!" she showed her pink barbie wristwatch. "It's ten past eight in the morning, Mommy! Auntie has to get up!"

I looked at my sister and gave her a playful glare that she just chuckled at.

"Why did you have to teach her how to read the time?" I asked her when she sat down on the edge of my bed.

"I didn't, Sis. She just learned it from her nanny." she chuckled again when I faked my cry.

"Okay fine! We're going to the park, but I won't take a bath. It's chilly!"

And the kid's eyes narrowed in disgust. "Yuck, Aunt Madi! You will stink!"

"Of course not! Even if I don't take a bath for three days, I won't stink." of course it's a joke to annoy the kid.

"Ugh! You're eww!" she crumpled her face as her mother and I both laughed at her reactions.

"Come on, Sis. You know your niece won't stop bothering you if you don't get up."

Madison kissed me on my forehead. It had been their gesture since I was a kid.

"Let's go, baby. Let your Auntie take a bath now, so you can go to the park together," she said holding out her hand to her daughter.

"But Mom?"

"Come on, Sarah. She will follow us downstairs, right Sis?" I smiled when she winked at me. And my stubborn niece didn't protest again, she just followed her Mom out the door.

I have no choice but to get up and go to the bathroom to take a bath because I'm sure my stubborn niece will go back in ten minutes to see if I fall asleep again.

I sighed as I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror. It's been three years and I haven't noticed how time has flown by so quickly. I am currently staying with my sister and in her family's house in Aurora, Colorado.

I've never stepped again in Chicago in the past three years. I didn't contact any of my friends there, except my three managers who I gave my authorization to decide and sign all the necessary documents and papers on my behalf.

I cut off all my connections to anyone connected to my previous job, especially the person I avoided the most... Gabriel Wilsons. It's been so hard for me to cope with my emotions during my first year of staying here. I cried almost every night and tried to forget every single memory of my painful past.

But eventually, I learned how to deal with my pain and how to play with it over time. It's not easy and I admit, there's the occasional night when I broke down and cried because I know I couldn't go back and change what happened. I have learned to accept the fact that there's someone I met and came into my life, but we're not meant to be and no matter what I do, things will never change and will never be the same again.

Honestly, I can't say I am completely healed and completely forgetting the past, but at least now I know how to handle the pain. And maybe this pain that I've been through, could be my greatest strength in the future or when our paths cross again.. who would know, right?

As they say.. healing begins the moment you accept the pain. Yes, I accepted it all and now I can find myself smiling every time I remember those memories, the time I left his house, and the time I said goodbye to my dying heart.

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Flashback...

***Where do I start to leave my life alone? I guess I'm learning, only learning... learning the art of letting go.***

After hearing the last lyrics of the song, I let all the tears come out of my eyes. I let my heart bleed for the last moment. And Bryan needs to stop the car just to pull me into a hug.

"You know what, if you don't stop crying... I swear I'll kill that fucking bastard, Madielyn!" he said, rubbing my back.

"No, please, Bryan, just let me cry for now and I promise after this, I'm going to fix myself again."

"You better be, Madi. You know how much we love you, right? The old man misses you, Sis. I hope this would be the right time to open your heart again for him. He loves you, and please let him explain. Maybe he can help you in some aspect of your life.. you didn't know."

I know he's referring to our Dad, but I didn't say anything.

We stayed there for almost twenty minutes and used his private jet to fly and to Florida. My mom was so shocked when she saw me with my brother. She hugged me immediately and I cried on her shoulders. There were no questions asked at that moment. She also hugged Bryan and motioned us to sit in the living room for a while then walked with me to my room.

She hugged me tightly as we sat in my bed.

"Embrace the pain of letting go of the painful moments in your life, Madi. Because if you do, it will make you stronger, braver, and kinder. Cry and scream if you have to. It might hurt when you move on, but then it will heal eventually with each passing day."

I pulled back from her embrace and looked directly into her eyes.

"What do you mean, Mom?" I asked in tears but she wiped them with her hands and kissed my forehead.

"I am your mother, Madielyn. Even when you don't open your mouth, I know what you're thinking. I know what things are bothering you in your mind and this." she smiled sadly and pointed to my chest where my heart is.

"Y-You mean, you knew everything?"

She sighed. "I told you, I am your mother."

"But how?" I asked as I straightened up and wiped my face with both hands. I didn't remember opening those things with her.

"Let's just say, you'll never become this fine and strong woman if your mother doesn't know how to make a move. I have connections, Madi. I know everything. Every single detail about you when you started living in Chicago."

My eyes widened when I heard what she said. "What about our uhm...m-mar---"

"Marriage?"

I gasped when she mentioned the word I found difficult to utter, but I nodded.

"The man who made you sign the marriage contract is one of my loyal friends." she shrugged.

"B-But that's Gabriel's lawyer," I said with my eyes still wide open.

"I know, but as I told you... I have connections Madielyn, and he's one of my high school suitors."

I bit my bottom lip. "But why you didn't tell me?"

"Well, it's because I want you to experience everything, my baby. I know I can show you the whole world, I can go with you to any place you want to see, but what I can't is to show you the reality that's hidden in every corner of it. And if this overwhelming breakdown is one of the processes, I will let you experience it. You know why... because that's the thing that I didn't learn when I was your age. I'm spineless and weak, unlike you." she cupped both of my cheeks.

"Mom...what am I going to do?"

"Release everything. You are stronger than the pain, my baby. Remember the old saying...'God's plan will always be greater and more beautiful than all your disappointments. Who would ever know, when you are completely healed you will meet the right person who will bring back your smile and will pick up all the pieces of your broken heart."

"Mommy...." I hugged her tightly.

There are no arms in this world that can ever compare to the warmth that comes from your mother's embrace.

"Come on, what's your motto again in life? You are who?"

I smiled with tears but proudly salute my hand while stating my old line.

"I am Madi! The ever-beautiful, confident, and STRONG Madi!"

"That's my girl."

She wiped my tears again and pulled me into her warm embrace.

We stayed in Florida for two days and then Bryan came with me to face the first man I loved in my life, our Dad.