Finding Forgiveness

Tears gathered in my eyes as I fixated my stare on the house which was now a roaring bonfire. There must have been over a hundred people in there but there’s no way anyone could have survived that.

“Why?!” I questioned again pushing his chest as he encouraged me into the SUV.

“Because I don’t fuck around when it comes to my enemies,” he replied. “They all had to die but I only felt the need to kill one myself.”

He then shoved me into the car and sat beside me.

My tears soon ran out and we were just sat in total silence for the rest of the journey. I couldn’t help but think about the men and women I’d met and seen briefly at the party who were all dead now or the bright hue of desperation on Gonzalez’s face seconds before Andrea killed him. It sickened me that I had been a part of this. A cog in the murder machine. Of course, Andrea had been the fuel and operator but I helped and for that, I knew I’d always feel guilty whether I had? chosen to or not.

When we got back to the house, we were greeted by a whole group of men that had been previously just lurking around the house, carrying big guns and keeping an eye out.

Most of them were tattooed and rough looking, others were younger and clearly new but they all wore huge smiles and let out leary cheers as Andrea got out the car.

His lips curled into a smile, “La victoria es nuestra! The victory is ours!”

One man came up to Andrea and shook his hand, “Felicidades, Se? or.”

Andrea laughed and pulled him into a hug, “Ayy, gracias Paulo.”

“Someone get the tequila,” he ordered releasing the man from the hug.

There was another huge cheer and the men began heading up the steps to the house.

Andrea slapped his hand around my shoulder and kissed my cheek before we followed the men inside, “You like tequila, my love?”

I shrugged and he led me up into the house and then into the kitchen where shot glasses of tequila were already being poured.

Andrea picked two up and handed one to me and waited a few moments until each of his men had one in hand.

“To Caracas,” Andrea announced holding his glass up.

“To Caracas,” they responded and all drank.

I particularly feel like drinking to the deaths of a hundred people but not wanting to draw any attention to myself, I did. It was strong and burnt my throat but I forced myself to swallow it.

“You like it, Blanca?” Andrea asked. “Huh?”

He then reached forward and began pouring me another.

“Oh no-” I began.

“Humour me,” he said giving me the glass.

I took it and knocked it back again but this time the strength soothed me.

Andrea smiled in satisfaction. His eyes then drifted down to everything the dress didn’t cover and flashed with black.

“Vuelve al Trabajo. Go back to work,” he said to his men and they all picked up their guns and filtered out in different directions.

He watched them as they assumed their guard positions in various places in the garden or at the front of the house before turning back to me.

“Vamos,” he said taking my hand. “Let’s go.”

He led me towards the stairs. I knew his intention and it made my heart pound and my mind searched for an escape route. But the tequila already clouded my thoughts and created a blockade to reason.

“Andrea, celebrate more with your men,” I said.

He turned to me and pressed his lips forcefully on mine, “I wanna celebrate with you.”

When he pulled away his smile was wide and unsettling. He lurched forward and kissed my cheek, making me flinch before taking my hand again and pulling me up the stair case.

Chico was stood on a balcony stretching off the hallway upstairs, looking out over the garden, a large gun in his hand. He turned briefly as we passed, looking from Andrea to my pleading face and I caught his eye for a millisecond before he turned back out to the garden.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

I let out an exasperated sigh, my only shred of hope ripped away from me. I was on my own now.

When we reached Andrea’s room, he let go of my hand and I moved across away from him, to the window, trying to control my heavy breathing.

For a few minutes, there was silence. I heard the metal clunk of him putting his gun down and then he just lay on the bed on his back with his head resting on his hands. I tried to focus on the moon. It glowed, casting its bright white light over the jungle, in its almost spherical glory. A few more nights and it would be full, I could sense it.

Andrea then stood up and I cast my eyes away from it, to a small beetle crawling across the railings of the balcony outside the glass panel doors.

“You did good today, Blanca,” Andrea whispered in my ear, standing behind me and putting his hands on my shoulders and slowly running them down the side of my arms. “You did real good.”

His fingers brushed along my back, sweeping my hair to the side.

“Let me get your zip,” he said reaching for the back of my dress.

I heard the metallic sound of the zip sliding down and the fabric of the dress loosen its tight hold on my skin. Andrea slipped it off my shoulders and slipped his hand down the front of the dress.

I refused to give him the satisfaction of my movement or even the slightest sound so instead, I just fixated on the beetle, scuttling around outside.

“There won’t be any interruptions this time,” he said kissing my neck.

I felt his lips on my mark and I flinched. “Please, just not that spot,” I whispered.

He looked up into my eyes, kissed it one more time before he stopped and instead, reached for my dress and pulled it further down.

“I don’t want you to be thinking about your Alpha right now, Blanca,” he said.

A tear ran down my cheek and dripped onto his hand which was on my chest.

“How can I not?” I choked.

The beetle had now disappeared over the edge of the balcony so I turned to face Andrea.

“There are so many girls out there that would willingly sleep with you,” I said. “Why must you have me?”

He smiled and cupped my face with his hands.

“Because I want you,” he said. “And I? always get what I want.”

His hand then reached for my breast and as he pulled my dressed fully off so that I was only in my underwear.

“I helped you,” I protested. “Caracas is yours now and I helped.”

“So far, your Alpha has killed eight of my men, located one of my stock warehouses with tonnes of products worth millions, nearly shot me dead, disrupted the runnings of my business and most importantly, you have both pissed me off. Whilst your help does not go underappreciated, it was not enough to make up for all the shit you and your mate have caused me. So if you want to live, you will let me fuck you. Understand?”

I nodded and he ran his hand over my chest as he kissed my mark once again before leading me to the bed and laying me down on the mattress. I was soon underneath him as he removed his tie and shirt.