I Rejected You, Alpha

ELEIA’S POV

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TWO WEEKS LATER

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“Why are you being like this?” I ask him as he just rolls out of bed, not saying good morning, not even looking at me before he gets dressed into a pair of shorts and he ignores me as he walks to the bathroom and brushes his teeth.

I sigh as I lay numb in bed, staring up at the ceiling.

I sit up as he comes out, not looking at me again.

“Aiden.” I call out to him, but he just keeps on walking to the door.

“Stop !” I yell, grabbing a pillow and I toss it at his head.

He freezes, his broad shoulders tense, the air in the room stiffening as he slowly turns, his tongue pressed to his cheek, “What the hell?” he grits out , glaring at me.

I throw the duvet off, standing, “We have to talk.” my eyes are wide as I stride towards him.

I reach for his fisted hand next to his side and before I could even touch him, he steps back, pulling away from me physically and emotionally.

“I have to go, I have training with the young wolves.” he shrugs before leaving me standing dumbfounded in the room.

My feet pull together as I stare at his bare back, the muscles tensing with each stride.

He hates me…

Instead of just going back to sleep, I take a shower and get dressed before I join Felix downstairs.

Aiden had hired a nanny for our tough time, it was only suppose to be a week and it has been extended to two now, but I need it. Being all smiley and happy when being around Felix isn’t hard because he’s adorable and I love him, he makes everything better, but sometimes I stare at him and imagine the baby I could have had if it weren’t for me .

It haunts me , the thought that I killed my baby haunts me…

I have nightmares that make me scream myself awake, sometimes I cry and other’s I am shaken by Aiden with an annoyed look on his face. Nothing is more haunting than the dreams of throwing my newborn baby off a cliff, stabbing him to death, drowning him and smothering him.

When I close my eyes, I see my nightmares all over again and I don’t want to have those dreams anymore.

Aiden is shutting me out more and more, we went from talking to arguing , to fighting over every thing and then nothing.Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org exclusive © material.

He doesn’t speak to me unless it’s about the party that is suppose to happen next week, the end of the month celebration to those who are alive and those who have fallen and I just…how can I throw a party when I feel like I can’t even breathe or think straight?

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NEXT WEEK’S END OF MONTH PARTY

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I stand in a pitch black gown that hugs my body, sipping on my drink while I watch everyone enjoy themselves.

Everyone, including Aiden and I am alone, standing one side .

Even Rosie is talking to some other new born moms and even though I already did the baby thing, she wouldn’t ask me a single thing about a baby because she’s afraid I might explode or something.

I haven’t had a good conversation in over a month and my heart feels like it’s being torn apart every second of every day since we lost our child.

I feel numb, like nothing can hurt me more, but when Felix is around, my heart feels lighter, only for about a few minutes before I am dragged bag into the darkness.

Rosie spots me and excuses herself from the moms before heading over to me, “Hi.” her soft smile is warm and welcoming and I force a smile onto my face, “How are you two doing?” I bend over, keeping a straight posture as I greet baby Duncan .

“He’s been good, how are you?” her lips are pressed in a thin line as she smiles, her edges barely curving up.

“I’m fine.”

I inwardly scold myself for saying fine, I should have known better .

Rosie c***s her head at me and my insides twist as I notice the concern in her eyes.

“He hasn’t spoken to you since this party started.” her gaze flicks to Aiden who’s standing, talking to a few guys.

“He’s busy.” I shrug it off and she nods, humming.

“Don’t.” my voice breaks at my plea .

“Oh Eleia..” the pity in her tone makes me blink profusely as I try to get rid of the unshed tears froming in my eyes.

A clearing of a throat booming through the speakers makes everyone fall silent and all of us turn to look at Aiden , standing on the small stage, ” Hello everyone.” he looks handsome wearing his black trousers with a matching long sleeve button up shirt, his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, the top button undone, exposing his standing out collarbones , his hair messy .

” I want to thank everyone for coming, because this party is for everyone, the ones here and in honor of the ones who are not. But tonight, there’s something I want to share with you. Some of you must have heard the rumors that my mate and I were having a baby.” A few whistles and claps echoes through the crowd and my heart sinks to my stomach.

“Well unfortunately, two weeks back my mate miscarried and we lost our baby…” the crowd falls in an awkward silence and I turn to Rosie with teary eyes. She holds my hand and I squeeze hers.

I need to leave…

“So tonight is special because this party is in honor to my baby.” I could tell he was trying to keep the smile on his face and it hurt to watch him fall apart.

“So…raise a glass to baby Moon, who’s watching us from above, hopefully sitting on the Moon Goddess’ lap, giggling and smiling.” he raises his beer glass and I can’t move. I feel like falling apart, but I could feel eyes on me, I could tell that a lot of pack members were watching me slowly lose myself and break down.

“Come.” Rosie wraps her one arm around my shoulders before taking her stroller and using one hand to lead us to the house.

I begin to sob as I enter, resting my back against the wall and everything rips lose.

All the fights, the lonely feeling, the heartbreak and aches , the pain coursing through my body, the harmful thoughts, everything crashes into me, breaking the barrier that was holding me together and I slide down, sitting on the floor with my knees to my chest, sobs filling the house.

Rosie just stares at me with pity, “We haven’t spoken in a week, h-he doesn’t look at me…he doesn’t want me..h-he h-hates m-me.” I sob, grabbing my hair and tugging at the strands.

“It’s my fault…I- I k-killed our ba-by.” I shake my head.

“I..I need to go…I n-need to g-get out of t-this p-pack…” I try to stand but my heels slip , my chest rising and falling as I try and just get off the floor.

“Sit still.” she lowers to her haunches, resting her hand on my shoulder and I flinch at the warmth of her hand.

I miss him touching me, I want him to hold me, I want to feel the sparks and the love .

“I do-don’t want to be a-lone.” I cry out and she hugs me, rubbing my arm up and down, trying to warm up my cold skin.

“Stop.” I widen my arms as I try to shrug her off me, but she doesn’t let go.

It feels like hours have passed when I finally stop crying, my eyes dry, but lashes wet.

“Let’s just go upstairs and I will help you into bed.” she stands , picking Duncan up before holding a hand out to me.

I take it and she pulls me up before we both move up to the room.

I don’t even get out of my dress when I fall onto the bed, my hair cascading around my face.

“Don’t you want to change into something comfier?”

“No. I’ll do it later.” I murmur.

“Do you want me to stay?” She offers and I want her to, but she has better things to do, she has to take care of Duncan and it’s not fair for me to ask her for her time when she has so little already.

“No.” I shake my head and no matter what I say, she grabs a blanket, rocking Duncan before sitting down on the couch.

I don’t say anything as I lay with my back to her, knowing that she’s there is more than enough to keep myself together and in check.

The door opens, but I don’t move, I just stare at the bathroom door with a blank expression, “Rosie.”Aiden’s voice is stunned ,”What are you doing here?” he’s tone is kind, caring .

I hear her foot steps move to the door side and Aiden’s voice turns softer, “Hey buddy.” he greets Duncan , making my heart burn.

“You should be this kind to her too.” she deadpans before walking out and the tension in the air shifts.

She shouldn’t have said that.

I hear his deep sigh before I hear his shoes hit the floor and I assume he took them off.

He waltzes towards the bathroom, closing the door, not looking at me and I hear him use the bathroom before coming out, wearing his trousers, socks and his button up shirt is flared open, exposing his toned abs.

His baby blue orbs lock on me and he freezes, staring at me with a sad gaze before shaking his head and he continues to walk.

“Aren’t you going to get out of that dress?” I hear him take off his watch.

“No.” I mumble, my lips barely moving .

Oh how I wish I was just a piece or furniture.

“Do you need help taking off your shoes?” he offers, but he’s just being all sweet because of what Rosie said mixed with the alcohol in his system.

I push myself off, my feet dangling off the bed and I lift each leg, taking my heels off before just laying down again.

“Eleia, I was just having a bad day. You were right, we should talk…” the bed dips behind me and then I feel the heat of his body, the warmth of his hand resting on my side radiates through the material of my black dress.

“You were like that all week, it wasn’t just a day Aiden.” I shove his hand off me.

He wants to have s*x because he’s half drunk, but I’d rather have him go f**k someone else than me.

I don’t want the love and warmth right now just to wake up to cold and alone in the morning.

“I’m sorry.” his hand rests on my waist again, making me weak with each second he keeps it there…

“Stop.” I sit up, twisting my upper body as I stare at him.

“Come on.” he tugs on my dress, making me fume.

“Go sleep with someone else because that’s all you want to do!” I yell as I stand up from the bed.

Within seconds he’s in front of me, staring down at me, “What the f**k Eleia? You are my mate, your job is to please me.” he grabs my nape, making my head roll back .

I stomp on his toe , but he only snarls as he pulls me closer.

“What has happened to you?” I cry out, but he just stares at me, his eyes flicking between mine.