Not Just A Luna; I Am Alpha!

Chassy

The sun is still down, but my eyes open on their own. I looked around my room, which I didn’t think anyone would be able to sleep in besides me. Besides a cot that I took from the used things in the pack’s garbage area and my worn-out bag with a few worn-out clothes that I also got from where I got my cot, A space where I could sleep was the only thing that my mother could provide me with.

I roamed my eyes around, and there was nothing unusual except for the fact that I felt like my eyesight had become clearer. I could also hear noises coming from-I don’t know where-because it was very faint. The scent of my room became stronger, and I realized that it smelled like shit, just like my life. ‘Hi,’ I said in my head, trying to get a response from my wolf if I had it. But there was nothing. It was all nothing but silence, no matter how many times I greeted her.

Am I really wolfless? Will there be no hope of changing my fate? Will there be no chance for my kind to have a reason to accept me, even if that shouldn’t be the case? After minutes of contemplation, I decided not to feel discouraged. It was still early, and I still had a whole day to wait to see if my wolf would resurface or not. I got up from my cot and started to warm up. It was going to be a long day and, just like any other day, tiring because of the pack members who were happy to see me suffer.

‘Hey,’ I tried to say in my head again, hoping someone would reply, but still, there was no one. I went out of my room holding a hand-me-down towel and worn-out clothes to go to the bathroom at the end of the hall. Mom’s house was slightly bigger. It was from her parents, who were both fighters of the Red Moon Pack, so I wondered why she was an omega. I took a bath in a hurry because the water was so cold. Mom didn’t want me to use the heater as it would consume electricity.

After I was done, I went back to my room and looked in the mirror. Hahaha… Mirror my ass. It was the glass window that I used as a mirror because I had already said that my room was bare. It was a plain room, without my cot and bag. I look good, as always. Of course, that’s only in my eyes. I don’t know about the others. I then went out of my room again and went downstairs, ready to work in the packhouse kitchen and receive maltreatment from other pack members.

I’m 18 and supposed to be having a good time off, but my mother will never let me. So, here I am, walking my way to the pack house, where my mother was starting to work for sure. No one in the pack was kinder. Everywhere I walked, there was murmuring and snickering, a continual reminder that I was their target. Each statement was a lash to my flimsy sense of self, causing me physical and mental damage.

I encountered taunts and teasing in the training yard when I passed as adolescent wolves rehearsed their shifts and sharpened their abilities. I couldn’t get the fortitude to face them, so I turned my attention to the ground as their boos resounded in my ears. It was still early, but they were so lively and energetic, tormenting me.

One of the more experienced wolves shouted, “Hey, Omega! Show us your shift! Oh wait, you can’t!” which caused the gathering to roar with hilarity.

My cheeks flushed with embarrassment as everyone could see that I was unable to shift. I clenched my hands, torn between the desire to fight back and the understanding that doing so would only worsen the pain. So I continued walking my way to the pack house, and I couldn’t help but remember why I suddenly stopped coming to school, even though I love to study.

School ought to have been a getaway, an opportunity to find comfort in books and knowledge. However, I discovered that I was ignored even in this educational environment and experienced the pain of exclusion most keenly in the classroom, which served as a microcosm of pack dynamics.

My thoughts strayed as I sat alone at my desk with a book open. I had always been drawn to tales of valor and fortitude, heroes who conquered hardship. I felt a spark of optimism at those moments, a desire to overcome the suffering that had dominated my existence.

And then, from behind me, a voice mockingly said, “Hey, omega girl, why don’t you just give up? No one here wants you.”

My heart sank when the same malice that followed me everywhere entered my refuge. I closed my eyes, finding solace in the made-up worlds that had given me a momentary break from reality.Belonging © NôvelDram/a.Org.

Because I thought that nothing was going to change even if I finished school unless I shifted, I decided to stop, and my mom was so happy that she didn’t need to spend money on me. As if she really did.

“You’re late,” my mom’s voice boomed into my being, and then I realized that I was already at the pack house. I had my head down and started to work on my chores so I wouldn’t get scolded by her, which I thought was only wishful thinking for me. Because no matter what I do, she still hates me and will always yell and shout at me.

It was in the afternoon when Alpha Xander asked for me in his room. “Get his laundry and clean his room. Don’t do anything stupid, or I am going to break your legs.” Mom threatened me. I nodded my head and went to the 4th floor, where Alpha Xander’s room was. I didn’t want to go there because I didn’t want to see him either. All the time that there was a pack gathering, I would hide myself and try to make myself invisible to everyone, especially high-ranking officials.

As I approached his room, a sudden feeling of nervousness engulfed me. I don’t know, but I had a feeling that something was going to happen, and I was sure that I wouldn’t like it. I was in front of his room when I smelled it. It was the most intoxicating scent I have ever smelled. I should be happy, but it scares me because I know who owns the room behind the door that I was standing in front of. He is there, my mate. My heart sank when the realization hit me that he was not going to accept me and that I would end up being rejected.

Without expecting anything, I knocked on the door, then I heard him say, “Come in.”