Chapter 107
Chapter 107
Chapter One Hundred and Seven
It’s hard to hand Merilee over to Cam so he can say goodbye in the morning.
If I were the one leaving, I don’t know if I’d have the strength to give her back. I never want to have her
out of my sight again.
He does eventually place her back into my arms, with one last gentle kiss to her forehead.
“You’re making the right choice,” Mia says to me.
I appreciate that she doesn’t try to bring up her vision again. I appreciate her more than I ever imagined
I could. We’re not best friends now, but something has shifted between us. We understand each other
better.
And it’s tough to cling to a grudge against her when she’s so insistent on not holding one against me.
Eric and Cam give each other a bro-hug, hands clasped between their chests while they thump each
other on the back. I marvel at their ability to do that, given how tightly Eric hugs Mia in the next
moment. Jealousy claws at my throat when he kisses her cheek, and I wonder how I’m going to survive
this when I get my wolf back and I feel the full force of this bond again.
The thought of a future with Eric leaves a sour taste in my mouth.
He stands for everything I hate—war and betrayal and the heedless quest for power. But seeing him
embrace someone else is just as unpleasant.
Goddess help me if this is how I’m going to spend the rest of my life.
I watch Mia and Cam climb into their car to head into Coldfoot, where they’ll catch their first plane,
hopscotching through Alaska’s interior until they reach their private jet in Anchorage. I’ve got an
uncomfortable sense that I’m not going to see them again any time soon.
The feeling tugs at my heart and I wonder if this is related to that pure heart crap Valaria talked about
when she ripped my wolf away.
Spending non-violent time with my sister seems like a decent first step in that process to me.
“We need to head out, too. Put on another layer. It looks like snow,” Eric says, brushing by me into the
house.
I sigh. Making peace with Eric is going to be harder than this truce with Mia.
There are better coats in the packhouse than the ones the California wolves packed. Cam brought
winter clothes for Merilee, so I make sure she’s covered, head to toe.
She’s small enough that I can still strap her to my chest with a wide band of cloth, then zip my coat up
over her. Her tiny face is tucked right above my heart, sheltered from the wind by my coat. Only the
very top of her head—covered with a fur-lined cap—sticks out.
The stronghold is north east of us, deeper in the Brooks Range. The trail is difficult for a wolf this time
of year with all the snow. For Merilee and me, it would be deadly to attempt it alone.
Since we can’t run in wolf form, we’re taking a snowmobile as far as we can. We need the speed in
case things go sideways.
Cassian is expecting us—alive—but that doesn’t mean the rest of the vamps in the area will respect his
wishes. They’re not like us. They don’t feel the same loyalty to a master that we do to an Alpha and our
packmates.
Obedience is a looser concept in their world.
They’ll eat anyone, even if it fucks with someone else’s plans. Without my wolf, I’m nothing more than a
light snack to these creatures. For the first time in my life, it’s safer for me to be in a vampire’s
stronghold than outside of it.
“Sit in front. Don’t want you falling off the back,” Eric says when I’ve put on enough layers to prove to
him I won’t freeze to death.
Between the heavy clothes and the baby, I can’t quite get my leg over the snowmobile. Eric lifts me
easily and sets me on the seat before climbing on behind me.
His back blocks the wind and I can feel the heat of his chest through my coat. When he grabs the
handlebars of the snowmobile, Merilee and I are caged in, surrounded by his warmth.
It feels…safe.
It’s also much more intimate than the truck. I’ve only been this close to him once before, and I was
asleep for most of it.
Now, I’m wide awake.
We speed off, kicking up snow behind us as we follow a thin trail through the trees. I’m aware of every
tense of Eric’s muscles, every shift of his weight.
I know that he’s still angry with me over Philipe. I’m not too happy with him, either.
But I can’t shake the little voice in my head telling me this is right. Me, my husband, my daughter.
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Underneath that is another voice, telling me I don’t deserve this. That one’s easier to listen to.
By mid-day, we’ve crested the top of a foothill. Below us is a wide valley, and in the center of that is
Cassian’s home.
It looks like a medieval castle—towers rise from the snow-packed earth at each corner of the stone
building, and an iron gate sits in the center of a high stone wall.
All of it’s for show; any vampire could easily scale the walls to get inside, or leap over it. The gates
wouldn’t be hard for wolves to breach.
A horrible thought occurs to me.
The walls aren’t to keep things out—they’re to keep people in. Like a pen for livestock
You can still turn back, Ash.
I clutch Merilee to my chest, the back of my neck tingling.
Think carefully about this. Do you really want to hand Merilee over to him?
It’s Philipe. He’s in my head, as loud and clear as if he were standing next to me.
I haven’t heard anyone like this—not since the Seer bound my wolf.