Unspoken Pleasure

“All that matters is I’ll be into her.” I laughed, walked over to the tree on my right and removed a beer bottle that was stuck in a small hole.

“Cute, that’s just the attitude your mother doesn’t want you to have.”

“Don’t give me that crap!” She was getting on my nerves again. “I’ve been with Jen for six months. She does care and she does want to.”

“I’m sure she wants to, Justin. You’re a good-looking guy who treats her better than she deserves. But I don’t think she cares.”

“Of course you don’t. You don’t like her.”

“I don’t think you care that much about her either.”

“What?”

“You like her, but do you love her? Every time you talk about her, it’s about how hot she is, not about how sweet or nice she is. I think you’re just getting horny and don’t want to wait anymore.”

“I care about Jen.” I didn’t say it with as much force as I should have.

I did like Jen. I really liked her, but did I love her? Did I know what love was? Hell, I was eighteen. ‘Really like’ was close enough, and I’d been good long enough. Besides, maybe once we slept together it would take us to that next level.

“I don’t believe you.” Sam picked up a can and tossed it in the bag. Sighing, she walked over to me. “Justin, I know you’re tired of me teasing you, and I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, Sam.” I shrugged. “That’s what friends are for. We tease each other, you make virgin cracks, and I make tomboy jokes.”NôvelDrama.Org copyrighted © content.

“Yeah, but the thing is I admire you for it. I really do.”

“You do?” I raised my eyebrows waiting for the punch line.

“I do. Not so much about the sex, but the fact you made a promise to be a certain type of man, and you are.” She put her hand on my forearm. “Forget about tomorrow. She’s not the one.”

“Oh, come on!” I rolled my eyes. “You know what, Sam? Maybe you’re right that I’m not madly in love, but I do like her and we have been together a while and … Maybe this will bring us closer.”

“You should love the person first.”

“Did you?” I turned it around on her, “Were you in love with that dink, Jack? Were you in love with Derek?”

“No, but I never promised I would wait and …” She shook her head. “I … settled, for both.”

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“If we’re going to talk, I’m getting in the shade.”

Sam sat down under the tree I had pulled the bottle from and I joined her, sitting in front of her.

“Don’t get me wrong, Justin. There was something there. Jack and Derek were both nice to me, but it wasn’t love. But, well, I figured both times, what am I waiting for? A Family Channel romance? Some perfect guy? So I decided to just have some fun. I guess that’s what it was because neither worked out.”

“So you knew you didn’t love them?”

“Right.”

“Then what the hell is your problem with me and Jen?” I said, putting my hands out. “You’re being a damn hypocrite.”

“I … I guess you’re right, but I never planned on it being that special, and at least those guys were serious with me. Jen is using you. It’s a game to her. Why tomorrow? What’s she doing tonight?”

“She’s … going to stay up at the beach and hang with-”

“Rob. Justin, Jen’s fucking around with him.”

“You-”

“And I’m sure she will come over tomorrow and fuck you because she does want to, but that’s all it would be and your first time will be sloppy seconds and-”

“Why the hell do you care so much?” I yelled at her. “Jesus Christ, Sam, give it a fucking break and just be happy I’m happy!”

“I care because you’re too good for that, Justin, and there’s better than her out there. If nothing else, girls like Jen are a dime a dozen down the line, but you wanted the first time to be special.”

“It will be.”

“Then why not wait a little longer? Dump that bitch and-”

“I’m not waiting! Why the hell do you think I can do so much better? Never mind. I’m not starting over and wondering how long it would be with someone else.”

“You can do better because you deserve better.” Sam looked down at the ground and looked as if she were trying to decide what to say next. A first for her.

Raising her head, she said softly, “Justin, on the outside, you’re a hell of a good-looking guy, especially like this.” She tousled my thick black hair. “I like your hair like this, not the way you put all that goop in it most of the time. And how many girls tell you how gorgeous those green eyes are?”

I grinned. “Quite a few.”

“And you played baseball and football.” She put her hand on my arm and squeezed. “You were a skinny little geek when we first met. Now look at you.”

I laughed and made a show of flexing my arm. “I do work out.”

“And it’s pretty obvious, but-”

“You checking me out?”

I meant it as a joke, but Sam blurted out, “Of course not! I … I don’t look at you like that. I was just trying to … make a point.”